Avoiding big questions in life?
What is big question? Why do we need to ask it? Or do we?
I have heard once, that you can’t run from responsibilities, then someone answered “of course you can, you just have been running not fast enough”, and I have started to wonder. Is it true? Is avoiding responsibilities and tougher questions leads to an easier life, and if so will I not feel guilty about it?
Years have passed and I am still wondering, now maybe I am a bit closer to the answer than before, but don’t take that for granted. This article will just show what I think about the subject. Maybe It will give you some direction, help resurface some additional questions, or simply waste 5 minutes of your life which will show you that time is precious… you never know.
The more you know
The more I know the less I understand, it looks like a typical problem of someone who had studied philosophy and never stopped. Each answer is leading to many different questions, and suddenly you can find yourself on a chaotic compass where each road leads in a different direction. Well then, how about skipping crossroads and travel the simplest way possible from point A to B? Without asking, without overthinking, without challenging reality? Maybe it is a sign of ignorance? If so, then why not? Like they have said in the Matrix “Ignorance is a bliss”, and sometimes I can applaud it enthusiastically.
Big questions in life, thinking deeply
What is a “BIG” question? Quite typical:
“Why is something the way it is and not the other way around?”
“What is something happening to me”?
Those two questions can make life better, more interesting, and meaningful, but also bitter, problematic and worse on many different levels. During everyday life, most people simply don’t have time to think too deeply about reality, their problems, and many different things that could disorganise their life. But is it worth it?
Every one of us probably at least once found him or herself in a situation when questions like “why” and “what” force themselves into the brain. Those situations happens usually during the night when we are vulnerable and daily chaos isn’t providing distractions for deeper thinking. In those moments we usually are making various scenarios about improving our life, trying to figure out a specific problem, or thinking about something from the past that had impacted our lives and made us who we are. Those questions can bring lots of distress, because of showing personal faults, mistakes, and missed chances. On the other hand, they can provide a necessary spark for finally moving ahead of your old self and become a different and better human. But the risk is still there.
If you are an over-thinker or know someone like that, you know that thinking (too much) can lead to many additional problems to which a “regular” person won’t even pay attention. For example, thinking about ways to improve your work, can lead you to a slippery slope when you suddenly start thinking about some embarrassing situation from your past and wonder why you acted like that. The result? In most cases sleepless nights, fatigue, and more difficult day at work than it should be.
In daily struggles overthinking can kill you, simple as that. Depression. Anxiety, inability to make decisions. Of course, those are extremes, but there is always the risk, that if you start thinking too much, you will slowly get closer to this point. Sounds scary and ridiculous.
Too much is bad for you?
But many times people think (at least I do) that in various situations if they didn’t think so much the outcome would be much better. Is it true? I don’t know and probably will never know, but the bad taste of such divagations always remains.
But back to the point. Are we deliberately avoiding asking ourselves BIG questions? I think we do. They simply distract us from the daily rat race. If we start thinking too much, we can suddenly ask an inappropriate question which will make our life harder than usual. This fear can efficiently stop someone from asking too much. As a famous quote from Futurama
“You are not paid to think, shut up and do your job”.
So maybe, just maybe life without asking anything which consequences reach more than few days ahead is worth a try, and will bring much more? I don’t want to be misunderstood, I don’t think that avoiding constant questioning your motives or torture yourself with getting deeper and deeper into the rabbit hole is good or bad, it just is.
And I don’t think that complete avoidance is possible. Big questions will sooner or later reach the surface of the conscious mind, and can bring as much help as harm. I think that such questions aren’t good or bad. Everything depends on how much our brain is trained to deal with them. If we are avoiding something for many years, a sudden clash with the subject or situation can show that we don’t have the necessary skills to push through.
Avoidance is a self-defence mechanism
Avoidance in many cases can be a defence system: If things in life don’t go according to plan for most of the time, we need to cut ourselves off from additional notions or ways that could make us feel and function even worse. Is it common? Looking at reality during pandemic I think that most of the ways to run away from problems and problematic questions are shut. Each lockdown and inability to do what we want, and spend time how we used to, bring us a bit closer to one or other questions that we were keeping out of our minds.
So, can we run from our problems and avoid asking ourselves (or others) BIG questions, so we can live (simpler) better?
Sure we can.
But is it a permanent state in which ignorance will become our shield for the rest of our life? — doubt that. Sooner or later something will hit us, and make us think about more than the oncoming day or the next meal. What we do then, could become a turning point in our lives, so my advice is
“Be prepared as best as you can”.
by Leszek Jasiński
